dear future boyfriend
by danahscott
Summary: Riley made a list when she was ten of things her future boyfriend would do for her. But lists like that are childish. We have to grow up sometime, right? (Or, all the ways Lucas accidentally lowered Riley's expectations and all the ways Farkle built them back up again.)
1. Prologue

At the back of her closet, covered in dust, taped to the wall but hidden behind shoeboxes, laid a very important list Riley Matthews had made when she was ten years old. She and Maya had spent the whole afternoon on it, and even though Maya made fun of Riley ("Why would you want _that_? I'd hate it if a guy did that for me"), she still helped her find the purple glitter pen.

THINGS RILEY MATTHEWS' FUTURE BOYFRIEND WILL DO FOR HER

Buy her flowers

Plan really cool, romantic dates for her

Call her on the phone (not just text!)

Know what her usual order at Svorski's is

Leave her little notes ("Gross.")

Watch her favorite TV show ("Why would that matter?")

Take pictures with/of her

Call her beautiful every day

She signed it, dated it, and taped it to her wall. She didn't really look at it too much afterwards, not at all when she started dating Lucas, but she never once forgot it.


	2. Buy Her Flowers

**1\. Buy her flowers**

Homecoming night. Riley had been so excited. She'd spent way too much time dress shopping with Maya who'd picked out her dress in ten minutes without even trying it on. But she was good at letting Riley pull her along, and when the time came, they both did the usual primping. Maya even let Riley curl her hair and paint her nails. It was so much fun, she almost forgot the boys were coming.

But when the buzzer sounded, Maya hopped up, making her way to the living room and slipping on her heels. Riley lingered a little bit, wishing she could stay in the fun of getting ready a little longer. She was excited for the next part of her night, though.

Maya swung the door open, revealing Zay and Lucas in matching red ties. Zay stepped forward with a long-stemmed daisy in his hand, smiling at Maya. "I was informed by Farkle half an hour ago that I was supposed to get you a corsage. This is all I got." Maya laughed and pulled him over to the side, leaving Riley and Lucas alone in the doorway.

"You look pretty," Lucas said, giving Riley a close-lipped smile. He was empty-handed. So he didn't get the memo on the corsage either, then. Lucas seemed to pick up on her disappointment because he said, "Sorry, Farkle texted me too, but my momma doesn't have a garden. Plus I didn't wanna get mud on my tux." Sure enough, there were dirt stains near Zay's knees, but Maya didn't seem to care as he tied the daisy stem around her wrist in a sloppy, looped knot.

"That's okay," Riley said, trying not to think about the dried rose and lace corsage sitting on her mom's dresser. There'd be other dances. There'd be other corsages. This wasn't really a big deal. But something else was bothering her - "Your tie is red. I thought we were gonna match."

"You texted me red. Didn't you?" he asked. Riley frowned.

"No, lavender. I told you Maya's dress was red. For Zay."  
Speaking of Maya and Zay, they were over in the corner laughing their asses off. "Miss Hart," he said, "shall we dance?"

"One night only, Babineaux," Maya said, as they started jokingly dancing around the living room.

Lucas furrowed his eyebrows at them. "Are they going together, like, as a date?"

Riley tilted her head. "I don't know." Would that be such a bad thing, though? She loved Maya and she loved Zay, so together that was just more love.

But that didn't matter. What mattered was that they were all friends and they were all together. Homecoming was going to be a special night.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

When they got to the dance, Maya and Zay hit the dance floor almost immediately. Riley hung back for a moment, waiting for Farkle and Smackle to show up. They'd broken up about a month ago, but still remained close friends, so when Homecoming came around and everyone else in their group had paired off, they'd decided to go together anyway.

"Riley." Farkle's voice sounded behind her. Instantly, her spirits lifted. She whirled around to see Farkle and Smackle standing arm in arm. Smackle was dressed in a beautiful dark green dress - Farkle had a matching green tie. Riley couldn't help but notice the corsage around Smackle's wrist.

Why did this bother her so much? These were just little things. What mattered was that she was here with Lucas, who had chosen her. That should be enough. Why wasn't that enough? But when Farkle smiled at her, she smiled back without even meaning to.

"Punch. Who wants punch?" Smackle said, already heading towards the food table and waving Zay over.

Lucas shrugged. "Yeah, I guess I'm thirsty."

It was just Riley and Farkle now, standing there, saying nothing, smiling at each other. "Riley," Farkle said again. She liked how her name sounded in his mouth. "Dance?"

Her heart felt warmer than it had all night. "Absolutely." She curled her fingers around his and let him lead. God. This reminded her so much of when they were little and practicing for their first dance and he stepped on her toes every other beat. He really had grown into a handsome young man.

The song faded out and another faded in, with soft guitar and a breathy female voice singing of loving and falling and being saved. Riley used to love this song. She and Maya had played it on repeat for weeks. She pulled away from Farkle and turned towards the speakers, smiling. Her eyes lit up. Everything inside her felt starry and bright.

In her periphery, she saw the flash of a camera in her direction. She turned towards Farkle with mild surprise. He lowered his camera and looked at her, almost shyly.

"Sorry, you just… looked really beautiful. And you know, yearbook and everything."

Riley felt her cheeks go hot at his words. But she just took his hand and started dancing with him again. It didn't matter that his date and her boyfriend were on the other side of the room getting drinks. Because this was just her and Farkle, dancing together. He'd been around for so long. This wasn't anything secret. This was the most natural thing in the world.


	3. Plan really cool, romantic dates for her

**2\. Plan really cool, romantic dates for her**

Date night was Friday night, but Riley and Lucas had skipped the past three. Deadlines, family birthdays, the usual excuses. But deep down, Riley knew it would be wrong to go a month without any dates, so she made sure Lucas knew he was going to meet her at her apartment at 7:00.

She put her usual effort in, a jean skirt with a floral blouse and her favorite brown boots. The buzzer went off at 7:05. Lucas was standing in jeans and a baseball tee pushed up to his elbows. He had a white paper bag in his hand.

"Hey," she said, smiling. "What are we doing tonight?"

"I thought we could stay in, watch a movie. Sound good?" Lucas said, walking in. Riley shrugged. That was what they always did. They scrolled through Netflix in silence for a few moments before Lucas hesitantly said, "Wanna see if Maya and Farkle can come over?"

Riley knew date night should just be the two of them. But she also knew they'd probably have more fun if Maya and Farkle were there too. They responded within minutes.

Maya: bold of you to assume im not on my way already

Farkle: I'll bring popcorn! :)

Good, Riley thought, because Lucas had already brought tacos in that white bag. Maya would be happy. As they waited for the others to show up, Riley and Lucas sat in comfortable silence. "What do you think we should watch?" Lucas said, breaking the silence.

Riley perked up. She'd already thought about it. "Ooh, I was thinking Titanic!"

Lucas scrunched up his nose like he smelled something bad, but only for a brief moment. Then, Mr. Okay With Everything shrugged. Nodded. Said, "If you want."

A small surge of irritation rushed up in Riley. If he didn't want to watch Titanic, he could just say so. But no, he'd go along with what she wanted. Why was that a bad thing? But she just sighed, saying none of that. "Maybe we should wait until the others get here."

Maya texted that she was five minutes away. Riley leaned back on the couch and sighed. "Tell me a story," she said to Lucas.

"About what?"

"Anything." She thought for a moment. "About your childhood, about Texas." She could almost hear Lucas shrug. But he started talking, a story about riding a horse for the first time. Riley was so fond of these stories. She was so fond of _him_. It was times like this that she almost forgot that they hadn't been on a real date in months. She liked his stories She liked talking to him. Maybe that was enough. Maybe she could settle for settling.

And then the buzzer sounded. "It's Farkle," she heard through the speaker. A smile sprang to Riley's face. She buzzed him in, and within a few minutes, he was knocking. Farkle, Maya, and Zay filed into the room. Lucas knit his brow. "Hey, man," he said to Zay. "I didn't know you were coming."

"I texted him," Maya said, looking towards Lucas but not at him. Zay slung his arm around Maya's neck. If Lucas tensed a little, Riley pretended not to notice.

"I tried asking Smackle, but she's taking the SAT in the morning, which is crazy since we're only sophomores, but Isadora Smackle is an unstoppable force," Zay said, smiling. "Still, you can't have movie night without Zay. Isn't that right, Honeynugget?"

"Oh, that's making a comeback?" Maya said, plopping onto a pillow she put on the floor.

"Hey, you came up with it. This is your fault."

"Oh? Yeah? You want me to start calling you Hunkalicious?" she said, pulling Zay down next to her.

"I would _love _for you to call me Hunkalicious. I would - hey, everyone, Maya Hart and Isaiah Babineaux now exclusively go by Honeynugget and Hunkalicious," he yelled, hands cupped over his mouth.

"Stop it. Stop it. I'll kill you," Maya said, dissolving into laughter. After a few moments, everyone joined in, except for Lucas who was slightly frowning.

"Farkle!" Zay shouted, after his laughter died down a little, "we were promised popcorn, I believe?"

"Just a second," Farkle called from the kitchen. Riley hadn't noticed him go in.

Lucas leaned down towards where Maya was sitting, paper bag in hand. "Hey, Maya," he said, voice low and teasing. She jumped a little in surprise at the sound of his voice. "I got tacos."

Maya's face exploded into a grin, and quickly Lucas' face matched hers. She snatched the paper bag out of his hand. "Did you get my favorite?"

"Extra cheese, red onions and green salsa. Your taco looks like a Christmas tree."

Maya pulled it out, grinning even wider somehow, and then, as if remembering herself, her excitement dissipated a little. "Well, thanks, Heehaw."

"No problem, ma'am," he said, and instead of shuddering like she used to, she sort of froze, blinked hard once and slid into her seat next to Zay again. Riley thought that seemed weird, but before she had time to think about it too hard, Farkle came back from the kitchen with the popcorn bowl in his hand. Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks. He was looking at Riley.

"What?" she said. His gaze was so intense, Riley felt he might crush her with the power of it.

He blinked hard, not unlike the way Maya had moments earlier. "Sorry." He took a few steps towards her until they were standing an arm's length from each other. "You just look really beautiful."

Riley's face flushed. "Well, you know, it was date night, so."

Farkle furrowed his eyebrows and his mouth to say something when Zay showed up out of nowhere and plucked the popcorn bowl out of Farkle's hands. "I'll take that, thank you. So," he said, returning to his seat next to Maya, "what are we watching?"

Lucas shrugged, making his way over to the armchair. "What about… Good Will Hunting?"

"No," Zay said. "No angsty ass cowboy movies."

"Seconded," Maya said. She shoved a handful of popcorn in her mouth. "What about A Quiet Place?"

Riley whimpered a little just at the title. She was always afraid of horror movies. Farkle's head snapped towards her and then he said, "Why not a Gilmore Girls marathon? I wanna see if Luke and Lorelai fall on the will-they side of will-they-won't-they."

Riley turned to him, eyebrows raised in surprise. "You watch Gilmore Girls?"

His ears turned red. "Oh, well… you told me how much you loved it."

Before Riley could respond, though, Zay had grabbed the remote and taken charge. "Nope. We're watching Love, Rosie."

Maya groaned, reaching for the remote, but Zay used his height to keep it away from her. "No sappy rom-coms, please, I'm begging you." But before she could protest further, the title sequence had already started rolling.

Lucas had taken the armchair, Maya and Zay elected to remain on pillows on the floor, so Riley and Farkle took the couch. By the time the movie was an hour in, she'd ended up laying next to him with her head leaning on his chest. Her face was inches from his. Somewhere deep inside of her, she knew that this was wrong when her boyfriend was sitting feet away. But it was Farkle, just Farkle, like it had always been just Farkle, and in the dark this felt safe, and natural somehow.

The movie was everything Riley liked in a film, but she still found her eyes drooping shut. "I think I'm falling asleep," she whispered.

"That's okay," Farkle whispered back. "I'll tell you what happens."

Riley smiled to herself. "But you already know what happens, don't you?"

"Yes."

"Of course you do. You're so smart, Farkle." She curled up closer to him. She felt herself drifting farther away. "I'm not gonna make it. Tell me now."

"Okay," Farkle said, and the last thing she heard before drifting off completely was, "In the end, they end up together."


	4. Know her usual order at Svorski's

**3\. Know what her usual order at Svorski's is**

Farkle was out helping Maya study for biology, Zay and Smackle said they were catching a movie together, which left just Riley and Lucas as the remaining members of the study group at Topanga's. And since there weren't any big history tests or presentations coming up, they decided to turn it into a date.

Riley felt a little guilty. She shouldn't be disappointed to have alone time with her boyfriend. And she wasn't. She wasn't.

They'd been talking for fifteen minutes now, not about anything in particular, when Lucas stood up. "I'm gonna get myself a sandwich. Do you want one?"

Riley smiled, a memory flickering in her mind. "And a drink? And cake?"

Lucas looked confused for a moment. "What?" he said, and then the crinkles in his forehead smoothed out and he smiled too. "Oh. I forgot about that. Well, what would you like?"

"Just my usual," Riley said.

"Which is?"

_We eat here every day, _Riley thought. But she said nothing about that, only told him that she'd like a grilled cheese with apple slices on the side. And then she sat back in the chair, wondering if Maya and Farkle were having any fun, wondering if Zay and Smackle's movie was any good, wondering if Lucas would try and kiss her today, and if she'd enjoy it if he did.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

Later that afternoon, Riley was lying on her bed, bored. Too bad Maya was busy studying, because it had been three and a half hours since they'd last seen each other, and a new movie came out on Netflix and - ugh. Her phone was ringing. Probably just a telemarketer like usual, but Riley decided to just pick up and pretend it was someone who actually wanted to talk to her.

When she heard Farkle's voice on the other end, her face split open into a wide grin. "Hey, what's up? How did studying go?"

"Good. I think we've worked hard enough for the entire class. Except for Smackle, of course."

"So Maya's getting A's again?"

"Are you kidding? I might have helped her in bio, but she's getting me through English."

Riley frowned, thinking. "You need help in English?"

She could hear Farkle sigh. "Yeah, well, things aren't as easy as they were in middle school. You know that. Besides, Mr. Jackson's having us focus on character development and feelings, not analysis. And, well, I've never really been good at understanding that stuff."

Riley was quiet for a moment. She thought of Farkle through the years, of Hazel the Hippo, of Romeo and Juliet and Farkle, of "I want you happy," of Pluto in his room, of clear beakers and permanent records. The words came out of Riley's mouth as she thought of them. "But you've always been good at showing it."

There was a living silence on the other end where she could feel Farkle's thoughts. Sometimes, she had moments like that with Farkle, where she'd look at him and know just what he was thinking and how it felt to think it, moments she didn't have with anyone else. That was how she knew the same slideshow of memories had just run through his mind too, when he said, "Thanks, Riley. It's weird. I've been thinking of when we were kids a lot lately."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. So much has changed since then."

She blushed a little while thinking of what to say next. "You used to be in love with me." There was a pause. "And Maya," she added.

"You were the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Can you blame me?"

It had been a long time since Farkle was so forward about his feelings with her. She almost didn't know how to respond. "And Maya?"

"I'm a man of science, and I could never quite figure Maya out. Science loves mystery."

"Hm," Riley said, silent for a moment. Then she decided to change the subject before they trekked any further into the past. There was too much that could go wrong."Anyway, why'd you call?"

"I was walking home from Maya's and I just felt like talking to you. I haven't seen you since lunch. Do I need a better reason? Because I can come up with one."

Riley laughed. "I know you can, Farkle. But as far as reasons go, I think that's a pretty good one."


	5. Call her on the phone (not just text!)

**4\. Call her on the phone (not just text!)**

Riley was nervous. And - worst of all - no one was there to be nervous with her. Maya and Zay were out at a party, Smackle was writing an extra-credit essay for AP Psych, Lucas had baseball practice, and Farkle was - BZZ!

Actually, where _was _Farkle? Riley went to answer the door, realizing she hadn't spoken to him all afternoon, when she swung open the door and - "Farkle! What are you doing here?"

"Couldn't let you go through your big night alone."

Everything inside Riley felt warmer. She had to resist the urge to throw her arms around him. She led him to her room, already feeling better now that he was here, but it was only once they were sitting in the bay window that she saw the takeout bag in his hand. "What's that?"

"I stopped by Topanga's and got your favorite."

"Ooh! Grilled cheese?"

"Even better," Farkle said, grinning.

"Mac and cheese?" When his smile grew wider, Riley knew the answer was yes. "But I thought they took that off the menu!"

"Riley, your mom owns the restaurant."

Riley laughed, reaching for the bag, but Farkle held it out of her reach. "What, you got me food and I can't even eat it?"

"When's the deadline, Riley?"

Oh. Riley looked down at her hands. "An hour from now." She sighed, exasperated with herself. "I don't know why I'm so nervous. It's just the school magazine. It's not even a big deal."

"You're nervous because it's important to you, which means it's important to me too." Farkle stood up and walked over to Riley's bed, picking up her laptop and bringing it back to the bay window. When he sat down, he was a good deal closer to her than he had been before. Riley tried to ignore how her heart started beating faster. It was just Farkle. Why would Farkle make her heart race? "Here's what we're going to do," he said. "You're going to submit your story, and then afterwards, we can eat this mac and cheese and watch Gilmore Girls, but you have to submit first."

Riley couldn't help but blurt out, "What if they reject it? I mean, Maya's art is who she is. And my writing is who I am. So, if they reject my story, isn't it like they're rejecting me?"

"They're not going to reject you," Farkle said, without any hesitation.

"How do you know?"

"Because you're a beautiful writer, Riley. I've always believed you could do anything you put your mind to. And you wanna know something?"

"What?" Riley said, so softly is was almost a whisper.

"You've never once proved me wrong." He placed the laptop in her hands. The cursor moved over the submit button. She was glad Farkle was here because if he wasn't, she might not have felt so calm when she placed her fingers over the mousepad and clicked.

True to his word, Farkle passed over the mac and cheese, which was even better than Riley remembered, and they started up Gilmore Girls. Halfway through the second episode and 15 minutes after the deadline had officially passed, Riley got a text message from Lucas: Good luck on your story :-)

Even though he got the time wrong, Riley was still surprised he'd remembered and a little touched. Never mind that Farkle was here with food and support or that Maya had come over last night, read her piece, and hyped her up for hours. This was sweet.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

At some point in their marathon, they must have fallen asleep, because when Riley woke up, the moon was shining through the bay window and the screen of the laptop was dark. It took a moment for Riley to realize what had woken her up, and then the sound came again: a sharp rapping at the window.

Farkle was sitting up, rubbing his eyes, but at the sound of the knock, he grew alert. "Don't move. I'll go see who it is." He got up from the bed and walked over to the window, tense. The person knocked again, and Riley wished they'd quiet down so they didn't wake her parents. Then, Farkle slumped, relaxing. "Riley, can you get the light?"

As Riley stood up from the bed, she saw Lucas' face illuminated in the moonlight. Lucas? What was Lucas doing here? Her brain was still too foggy with sleep to deal with his reason for knocking on her window after midnight. But Farkle was throwing the window open anyway.

Lucas did not look like he was having a good night. His jaw was tense, the look in his eyes determined and angry. Riley usually avoided him when he was like this. But before she could say anything, he was climbing through, half-carrying something - no, someone - in with him. "Delivery for Riley Matthews," he said, and only then did Riley see who he was carrying.

Maya. "You don't have to carry me, Huckleberry. I can walk."

"Really?" Lucas said, carefully setting her down. "Maybe you should've said that before you passed out on the sidewalk!"

"I didn't pass out, I tripped. What, I'm not allowed to fall?" she countered. Lucas huffed, but before he could respond, she was swaying. "Which I might just do again." Lucas placed his hands on her shoulders, steadying her, and then led her to the bed.

"Lucas?" Riley interjected for the first time. "You were at that party?"

"No," Lucas said. "But someone had to get Maya home."

Riley turned to Maya, trying to wrap her mind around what she was seeing. "So you called him?"  
"That might have been me," Zay said in a loud whisper, poking his head through the window and very wobbily climbing in. "Those stairs when you're drunk are a mindfuck. We tried calling you two, but you didn't answer, so we figured you were asleep. Guess we were wrong."

Farkle yawned, as if on cue. "No, we were."

"Which sucks for us because Moral Compass here hasn't stopped lecturing us since he showed up. Mostly just me," Maya said, glaring at Lucas, who didn't shy away but matched her intensity. Maya broke first and looked away. "Besides, I'm not even that wasted."

Lucas didn't look away from Maya. Riley might as well not have been there at all. "I had to pry you off of a college guy."

Maya rolled her eyes. "It was Josh!"

"No, it wasn't," Lucas said.

Maya blinked, looking to Zay. "It wasn't?" Zay shook his head. She suddenly started laughing. "Oh. Maybe I am that drunk." Zay started laughing too. Even Riley and Farkle chuckled.

Lucas did not. "Zay, why did you let her get so drunk?"

Zay held his hands up in mock surrender. "In my defense, I am also drunk."

"Also in his defense," Maya said, standing up (Riley could see Lucas instinctively twitch to go stop her), "he doesn't let me do anything. He's not my dad."

No one was laughing anymore. Whenever Maya mentioned her dad in front of the group, no one really knew how to react. It was safe to say that didn't happen a lot. But apparently Drunk Maya didn't have the same walls up as Sober Maya. Even Lucas was at a loss for words. But Maya wasn't done yet.

"I mean, jesus, all I needed was a ride home. You're not my fucking babysitter, Lucas. You're not my anything."

Lucas stepped back, visibly hurt. "I'm… I'm your friend."

"No, Zay's my friend. You're just the guy who's dating Riley."

"Maya," Riley said, sharply. Zay sucked in a small breath and looked down. Farkle was seemingly unphased, except for the little furrowing of his eyebrows.

Lucas, on the other hand, blinked hard a couple times, shook his head and said, "I should get going. I still have to get Zay home."

"Can I have a ride too?" Farkle said. Maya, who had climbed back into Riley's bed, didn't seem to notice the effect her words had on the rest of the group.

Lucas told Farkle that he could and then made his way to the window. "Bye, Riles."  
"Only I call her Riles," Maya mumbled from the bed, already half-asleep. "Only I get to do that."

Lucas looked at her over his shoulder, worriedly, and then was gone. Farkle lingered a moment. "Good night, Riley. And good luck. With your story and with this," he said, gesturing to Maya. "Though I think you'll need more luck with this." Then he was gone too. Riley turned off the light and climbed into bed next to Maya.

She shut her eyes, trying to sleep and finding herself unable to. Nothing like that had ever been said between anyone in the group. Sure, there had been fights, but no one ever denied that they were friends. And yeah, Maya was drunk. Riley just hoped that that was enough to stop this from rippling into a bigger disaster tomorrow.

Riley was just starting to finally drift off when she heard soft sniffles coming from Maya's side of the bed. "Maya?" Riley whispered. "What's wrong?"

Maya took a while to respond. "Nothing, Riley. I'm just drunk. Go back to sleep."


	6. Leave her little notes

**5\. Leave her little notes.**

The theater department was selling Shakespeare-grams. Apparently, they needed more costumes for Twelfth Night, so Farkle had come up with an idea - you pick a Shakespeare verse and members of the drama club deliver it to the student of your choice, along with a snickerdoodle.

Maya groaned when she heard about it. "If any of you get me one, I will kill you." Riley had gotten one for each of her friends, then pooled her money with Zay to get Maya eight. By the end of the school day, Riley received two Shakespeare-grams and several glares from Maya. Zay, on the other hand, had earned a punch on the arm for only putting the gushiest, lovey-dovey-est quotes on the cards.

Riley's were from Zay and Smackle. Zay loved the idea, though he was upset he couldn't send quotes from She's the Man or 10 Things I Hate About You, even though they were "close enough." Smackle took a lot of joy in picking out verses that suited her friends perfectly, especially since she'd already read the entire works of Shakespeare.

Riley was more than a little disappointed she didn't get a note from Lucas. She knew it wasn't his fault, considering she didn't tell him she wanted one, but anyone who knew Riley well would've gotten one for her. She wanted a little romance. Was that too much to ask for?

She didn't think so. Especially considering how their relationship started. Riley had felt a little silly writing out "Eyes, look your last. Arms take your last embrace," but she felt even sillier now. And when Lucas was the first one through her window that afternoon, she found herself bringing it up. "Did you like my Shakespeare-gram?"

Lucas nodded, half-smiling. "Yeah, though the quote was kind of a bummer."

Riley's breath caught. "You don't - Remember? And lips, oh you, the doors of breath." Lucas half-nodded, but his eyes were clouded over in a way that told Riley he didn't know what she was talking about. She had one more clue for him, and if Lucas didn't get it, then Riley really wouldn't know what to say. "Your moment?"

Finally, this seemed to register. "Oh. Wow. Seventh grade. That feels like forever ago, doesn't it?"

Not really, Riley thought. But then she thought of who she was back then… what she'd wanted. She wasn't that girl anymore. Maybe Lucas was right. But she thought of seventh grade a lot. What it was like to fall into Lucas' lap for the first time, the butterflies she'd gotten when he'd spoken French to her, looking into his eyes in the dark library and having him look back. Those were her favorite memories of the two of them. Riley remembered what it was like to feel that way about him, but in a distant way, like they were scenes in a book she'd once read. Still, today, something nagged at her. "I just… I didn't get a Shakespeare-gram from you."  
Lucas didn't hesitate when replying. "Oh, yeah, I didn't send any." When Riley said nothing, Lucas furrowed his brows in confusion. "I don't know, they're kind of corny, I thought. I still helped out though, I got that brownie at the bake sale."

"But Shakespeare is one of our things. We were Romeo and Juliet."

"Well, yeah, but…" Lucas trailed off when he saw Riley's face. "Wait, are you mad about this?"

Riley considered the question, just for a moment, then sighed. "No, I guess not."

Before Lucas could respond, Maya stuck her head in through the window. "Is Farkle here yet? I need to kill him."

Riley raised her eyebrows, amused, as Maya slid next to her. "And why's that, Peaches?"

"Because Farkle is responsible for these," she said, holding up six red cards. A smile spread across Riley's face.

As if on cue, Zay's head popped in next to Maya. "Oh, beloved?" he called. "Wherefore art thou?"

Riley laughed as Maya made a face. "He's next." Lucas shifted over, making room for two more. Riley was smiling, but he seemed slightly uncomfortable. Maya either didn't notice or didn't care to comment on it. "No, really, look at this crap." She read the card in the flattest tone possible. "Doubt thou the stars are fire. Doubt that the sun doth move. Doubt truth to be a liar. But never doubt I love."

Zay slid off the bay window and got down on one knee, as if he was serenading her, or proposing. "Dost thou doubt thee, my sweet?"

"I don't think he's even saying it right," Maya muttered.

"Curse thy name if thy love be doubted!"

Lucas sighed, shaking his head. He was smiling too now, but in a strained way, which was strange. "Don't you think this is a little much, Zay?"

Zay gasped, clutching his chest in mock offense. "A plague on your house, Friar." Before he could hurl more Shakespearean insults Lucas' way, their party gained another member.

"Hey, guys," Smackle said.

"Hark! A fair maiden appears!" Zay pointed in her direction.

Smackle raised her eyebrows. "How long has he been doing this?"

"All day," Maya said, rolling her eyes.

Smackle grinned. "Cool."

"No, not cool," Maya said. "Look at this. 'See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand! O, that I were a glove upon that hand, That I might touch that cheek!'" Zay started reaching his hand towards Maya's face but she caught his wrist. "Touch my cheek, lose your hand."  
"Oh, how you wound thee."

During this whole exchange, Lucas' eyes darted warily from Maya to Zay and back to Maya again. Riley decided not to notice. She was having fun. She'd prefer to focus on that.

The doorbell rang. Smackle pointed in the direction of the sound. "Who dost go there?"

Zay's eyes widened in delight. "Isadora Smackle, you speaketh my language."  
"The only one we're missing is Farkle, but he usually comes in through the window." Riley looked around, then stood up. "I'll go see who it is."  
"Want me to come with you?" Lucas said.

Riley didn't know why, but she found herself saying, "No, that's okay." And it was okay, because the person at the door turned out to really be Farkle, holding a long-stemmed sunflower. "Farkle!" Riley greeted him, smiling. "Why'd you ring the bell?"

"Well, I was walking here and I saw a flower cart, and this flower was really beautiful, and well…" He scratched the back of his head. "It reminded me of you. But I didn't want to crush it crawling through the window."  
Riley felt like glowing. "I love it." She took the flower from him, her fingers brushing against his. They didn't move from the doorway. Riley didn't want to join the others just yet. But she probably should say something. "Maya's got a death threat out for you, by the way." That unglued her feet, and Farkle followed her as she went to get a vase.

"Ah, why this time?"

"Zay flooded her with Shakespeare-grams. I might have given her some too. It was such a good idea."

"Too bad I was so wrapped up in organizing it, or else I would have sent some."

"What would you have sent me?"

The question didn't seem to surprise Farkle. "Oh, a quote from my favorite Shakespeare play. It's a little obscure, but it's called Romeo and Juliet and Farkle."

Riley laughed. "What quote would you have used?"

Farkle smiled a little sheepishly before saying, with gusto, "You tried to kiss my woman. This I cannot allow. Prepare to die!"

"Whoa," Riley said.

"Yeah, I was a little intense back then." That might have been an understatement, but Riley didn't interrupt. "In my defense, we'd just watched The Princess Bride and I thought it would impress you, since it was your new favorite movie."

Riley twirled the flower in her hand. "How do you even remember all that?"

"My mom got the whole thing on her camcorder."

"No, I mean… Seventh grade. That feels like forever ago." She repeated the words Lucas had just said to her. They felt less true when she said it to Farkle, though. "I mean, we're not the same people we were back then."

"We're not," Farkle nodded. "You're talking to the former Dr. Turtleneck. But that was the year Lucas came into our lives. That was the year we became us."

Riley tilted her head, considering this. Farkle had grabbed a vase filled with water while he spoke, like he was talking about some casual, known thing. But Riley supposed he was right. Where would they even be without Lucas? He was so kind and brave and such a good friend - to all of them. Without him entering their lives, Riley wasn't sure she'd have all the friends she had now. She certainly wouldn't have Zay. She was glad to have a friend like Lucas. A boyfriend. A boyfriend like Lucas.

"Speaking of Lucas, how are things with him and Maya?"  
Oh. Riley had almost forgotten about that. Maybe that was why he'd wanted to go with her to answer the door. "Things are still tense. I don't know, they haven't really spoken to each other much." Maya had woken up the night after the party claiming to have no memory of the night before. Riley almost believed her. She wanted to. But she also saw the way Maya tensed up when Lucas sat at their lunch table on Monday. She knew Maya too well.

"Not talking. Guess that's not much different than before," Farkle said. Wait. Was that true? Riley racked her mind for the last conversation she'd seen Maya and Lucas have. She came up empty. Huh. That was strange. That wasn't how it used to be.

Still brimming with this new spiral of thoughts, Riley followed Farkle to her bedroom door, but when he turned back to smile at her, the thoughts unraveled and fell away. "After you, Juliet," he said, with a flourish.

Riley was more than happy to play along. She curtsied, turning the knob. "As you wish, spear carrier."


	7. Watch her favorite TV show

**6\. Watch her favorite TV show**

Riley had barely seen the sun - or her friends - all weekend. It had just been her and Maya, holed up in the bay window, studying for the big Spanish test. Raising your level didn't happen overnight. But by the time the sun rose Monday morning, Riley felt ready.

Still, her stomach was churning as the day went on. Too bad Spanish was third period, because she could use lunchtime to study. Though it might be nice to eat her grilled cheese with an untroubled mind. Riley was only thinking about the past tense conjugation of _-ar_ verbs as she checked her locker - was it _aban_ or was that the imperfect form? But on top of her books, a note that wasn't there before sat, written on orange paper.

Riley pulled it out and opened it, curiosity driving her every move. "_Buenas suerte, bonita, para tu examen hoy. Tu amigo, Farkle." _She felt a little flutter in her stomach, and not from nerves this time. Farkle was in German, Smackle was in French, while Lucas and Zay took American Sign Language which was new this year, so that meant Farkle must have google translated this note for her.

That was… How did she get lucky enough to have such a good friend? _Buenas suerte, bonita. _The words played in her mind. They rolled off the tongue. She understood now why Spanish was a romantic language. _Buenas suerte, bonita. _Riley liked the sound of it. What she liked more was that Farkle had sent it to her to tell her that her friends believed in her. That he believed in her.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

When she went to lunch, those hours of studying already used and paid off, she was in a good mood. She was excited to see Farkle and thank him for the letter, see what Maya thought of the test, and, yes, eat some grilled cheese. So she was surprised when Lucas sought her out in the hall. He didn't usually do that.

"Hey, Riley. Are we still doing date night after school?"

Oh. Right. She had been studying on Friday so they planned on rescheduling. "I guess so."  
"Cool. Movie at your place?"

Why was she expecting that? She nodded, and Lucas started to walk away. But before he got two steps ahead of her, Riley was hit with a small wave of bravery. "Don't you wanna know how my test went?"

Lucas looked at her, scrunching up his face a little. He looked less Prince Charming-y when he did that. "Huh? Oh. Right. I forgot. It went okay, though?" Riley shrugged and nodded. She didn't know why she'd bothered.

She ended up beating Lucas to the cafeteria, and as she slid into her seat, Farkle caught her eye. "Riley. How did your test go?"

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

And so, there they were on the couch, Riley and Lucas, scrolling through Netflix again. "We could watch Cool Hand Luke," Lucas suggested.

Riley scrunched her nose up. "Isn't there a lot of violence in that?"  
Lucas shrugged. "I guess so."

As he kept scrolling, Riley decided to try something. A test of sorts. She was feeling bold tonight. "How do you feel about Gilmore Girls?"

Lucas raised an eyebrow, but he shrugged again. "If you want."

"Well, I asked how you felt about it."  
"I'm okay with whatever you want to watch."

"Forget it," Riley said, slumping forward, resting her elbow on her knee and her chin on her palm.

"I said we could watch it," Lucas said, sounding genuinely bewildered.

"I want you to want to watch it!" Riley's words came out as a storm.

Lucas shook his head, clearly confused. "I don't even know what that means!"

Riley stood up, stepping away from the couch. "I want you to want to watch it," she said again, "because I love it and you want to know about the things I love." Lucas looked tired. He rubbed his eyes and looked back at her. But he said nothing. "You chose me, and now it's like you don't even care."

Lucas shook his head again, but now he seemed kind of mad. "You're just -"

"What?" Riley snapped. A memory flared up inside her. "Too much for you?"  
"I didn't say that," Lucas said, finally standing up too. "It's just - well, you never watch the stuff I like. Does that mean you don't care either?"

Oh. He had her there. Well, Riley didn't know. Maybe that was what it meant. She hoped not. She really hoped not. All Riley knew was she was tired too. "I don't think we should do this right now," Riley said to him.

"Yeah, I agree."  
"Maybe you should go."

Lucas sucked in a small breath. He didn't look that upset, more surprised. He took a few steps towards the door and then turned back to her. "Are we breaking up?"

_You know what I don't want? I don't want to go out for a while and break up and not like each other anymore. Isn't that what happens next?_

"No," Riley said, shaking her head. She might have been mad, but the thought of losing Lucas still broke her heart. Her life had only been better since he'd come into it. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"  
"Okay," Lucas said, lingering in the doorway. "I just don't get what the big deal is."

The anger came back to Riley like a flood. "Exactly. You never do."


	8. Take pictures withof her

**7\. Take pictures with/of her**

Today was the day Riley Matthews turned sixteen. Needless to say, she was excited. Riley loved celebrating her birthday every year, especially now that her friend group was so large. Lucas wasn't in town, though. His cousin was getting married and he was one of the groomsmen, so he was in Texas. Plus, Maya had started work at an arts and crafts store and she had a five hour shift she couldn't get out of. But Riley was determined to stay positive. Maya promised to spend all morning with her and stay the night. Zay and Smackle were coming over tonight for presents and cake.

Which meant the rest of the day was saved for Farkle. He wouldn't tell her what he'd planned, which made Riley even more excited because she loved surprises. But right now was Maya time.

"Hey, Riles? I'm gonna go raid your fridge. Can you text my mom that I'm going straight to my shift from your place?" She tossed Riley her phone and left the room.

Riley had known Maya's passcode since Maya got a phone. They didn't keep secrets from each other. That was what Riley told herself as she clicked on a new text from Lucas. As far as Riley knew, Maya and Lucas still weren't really talking. She hadn't noticed until Farkle pointed it out, but once she started paying attention, she saw how Maya dodged his rare questions and how neither of them would really look each other in the eye.

So if they were texting, Riley was dying to know what about. She shouldn't have been surprised when the first thing she saw was a picture of her. Her and Lucas, specifically, a candid from the day he rode with her on a white horse. Maya had sent it to him with a text saying: post this for riley's birthday.

Lucas: Why? I was just gonna text her

Maya: because she's riley. she likes this kind of thing.

Lucas: Does this mean you're talking to me again?

Maya: i don't know what you're talking about.

Maya: just post it okay?

One last text from Lucas: Sure. I'll put it up in a few hours

Riley tried to scroll up to see their previous conversations, but that was it. She clicked the phone off and sat back, thinking. This all felt so familiar. Just like middle school, Maya was pulling the strings of Riley's relationship. Again. Should she be mad? She felt a little angry. Her relationship was her relationship. How was it supposed to grow if they were never given a chance to try on their own?

"Birthday donut for the birthday girl," Maya said, appearing in the doorway. She was leaning against the doorframe, smiling and holding a plate with a rainbow-sprinkled donut. "I was going to jam a candle in there or something but after an art project gone wrong, Shawn decided fire and I don't mix."

Riley's anger immediately dissipated. Her best friend loved her, and she meant well. It was hard to break old habits. But Riley had a feeling it would be "whatever you want" for the rest of their lives. Somehow, that thought made her inexplicably sad.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

Riley was meeting Farkle outside Topanga's. They weren't going in, but it was a good place to meet up since it was close to the subway. That was all Farkle would tell her, though. He took surprises almost as seriously as she did, it seemed. (A voice inside of her whispered that it wasn't because he liked surprises, but because he knew she did, but Riley pushed it down.)

When he saw her, he smiled big and opened his arms to hug her. He was warm. And when did he get so tall? They held the hug for maybe a little longer than usual, but screw it, it was her birthday. Farkle was the first to pull away. "How's the beautiful birthday girl?" Riley's heart gave a weird flutter at the word "beautiful." When had Farkle started having this effect on her? She hadn't felt this way during her last birthday, when they'd all stuffed their faces with pizza and binge-watched High School Musical. Farkle got home so late that even his dad managed to notice and he was grounded for one whole day.

That was great. But it was different from how she felt about him now. How had that happened? Had she gone to sleep one night and woken up the next morning with new feelings? No. This was something slow and quiet and massive. Something Riley had felt for longer than she'd known and known for longer than she'd realized.

But… what? She loved Farkle. That had always been true. Did it really matter how? Yes. It did. Because Lucas. Because Riley had a boyfriend. A boyfriend who Farkle was friends with - best friends. Not to mention Riley had spent a year dragging her relationships halfway through hell because she thought she loved Lucas. Didn't she? Love Lucas? Everything was so mixed up. And Farkle's hand was still on her arm.

"Riley? You okay?"

And it was her birthday.

"Great," Riley said, quickly. "What's my surprise?"

"Well, if I told you, it wouldn't be one. So let's get going."

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

As they rode the subway, there weren't enough seats so they stood, holding onto the pole. Every time their fingers brushed together, Riley had to look away.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

When they finally stepped out of the subway into the snowy New York air, Riley had no idea where they were. She shoved her hands in her pockets, deep, to keep them from freezing (and to lose the feeling of his hand brushing against hers). Luckily, it was a short walk before Farkle stopped in front of a building and held the door open.

As Riley walked through, she was suddenly transported into spring. There was green all around, with bright spots of color, of pink, yellow, red, blue - flowers. Well. He definitely surprised her. "Do you like it?" Farkle asked, a little nervously.

"I love it," she said, breathless. "I love it, Farkle." He'd brought her to a greenhouse. When she looked back at him, his ears were red and not just from the cold.

"I know how much you love spring and I thought maybe you'd like to come here -" He rifled around in his pocket and pulled out two packets of seeds - "I thought you might want to plant something."

Riley grabbed a packet. "How'd you even find out about this place?" she asked, letting him lead her to an empty patch of dirt.

"Smackle showed me," he said. Riley blinked, surprised, waiting for him to continue. He did. "She got into this botany hobby back when we were still together, and she found this place and made some connections, so when she showed me, I thought of you and how much you'd love it, so she helped me get access for the day."

Riley hesitated. There was a question on the tip of her tongue that had been burning there for a long time, but she didn't know if she should ask it. She'd wondered since Farkle and Smackle showed up to lunch one day and sat across from each other instead of side by side. The words came out anyway. "Why did you two break up?" Farkle looked surprised. "You guys just made sense together."

"We did," Farkle said, with a familiar look on his face that said he was thinking hard. "But making sense doesn't always mean it feels right. You taught me that," he added clumsily, the words coming out in a rush. "Science can't dictate love. And it's like Sense and Sensibility. Remember, in eighth grade?"

Riley tried to see what he was getting at. "And you were sense and sense?"

"I don't know. I used to think that was how it worked. But now I think maybe Harper was trying to teach us something else. We're not just sense on our own, but we were together. I think we had both sense and sensibility at the beginning, but after awhile… Remember when you got us together and we talked about how like forces repel?"

"But then you found out you weren't like forces."

Farkle smiled. "And then we were. We're not all that different, you know. It's like this: people change people. And I think we helped each other grow as much as were going to as boyfriend and girlfriend."

Oh. So it was that simple. And that complicated. "So that was what it was?"

"That and what we should have been feeling for each other… we were feeling for other people."

Riley's heart dropped and then leapt up and then pinballed around inside her like it was trying to break out of her ribcage. "Who - who were you… feeling for?" she asked, though she knew she shouldn't.

"Not me," Farkle said, though the tips of his ears burned red again, a tell that he was nervous or lying.

The disappointment that fizzled inside Riley was quickly replaced by curiosity. "Smackle? Who does Smackle like?"

"You'll have to ask her that."

"But I thought the breakup was mutual."

"Oh, I got dumped!" Farkle said, and Riley couldn't help the laugh that burst out of her.

She clapped her hand over her mouth. "Sorry!" she gasped.

"Don't be sorry," Farkle said, smiling. "It's your birthday. You can laugh at whatever you want."

Riley smiled back, finally letting the subject drop. But there was something she couldn't shake from her head: that when he talked about having feelings for other people, he used the word "we."

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

They spent that day planting flowers and laughing. Every time his arm brushed against hers, she found herself being hyper aware of his touch, the way it made her feel warm inside. But by the time the sun went down, Farkle ushered her out the door, telling her he had one more surprise. Twenty minutes later, he was passing a cup of hot chocolate into her hands, and Riley was in a park, surrounded by twinkling lights.

"It's called Illumination. They do it every year around the holidays."

He led her around the park, and their hands dangled close to each other without touching. There was a tree with lights that changed color when you touched it, and lights that seemed to dance to music, and a tree that lit up to the sound of a voice. There was a line with kids singing Christmas carols into a microphone or screaming as loud as they could just to see what happened. When Farkle got a turn at the mic, he looked at Riley and said "Riley Matthews." He paused as the tree transformed into glittering silvers and golds. "That is what it feels like when someone says your name."

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

By the time Riley got home to her party, her face was sore from smiling so much. Zay and Smackle arrived with a joint present for her, and Maya came with birthday cupcakes. She held one out, lit with a candle. "Make a wish, Riles." And as Riley blew the candle out, her phone lit up with a notification:

tagged you in a post: "Happy birthday to my girlfriend! rileymatthews"

Well. They would have a lot to talk about when he got back.


	9. Call her beautiful every day

**8\. Call her beautiful every day**

It was the last weekend before winter break ended, and it was one of those gorgeous fleeting days where the sun came out and the weather climbed up into the fifties before snow came again. So today, everyone was outside of Topanga's, enjoying the weather while it lasted. And by everyone, Riley meant Maya, Farkle, Smackle, Zay, and Lucas who had just come home.

He spent the holidays in Texas with Pappy Joe. When he'd come back from the wedding, everyone was working on finals prep, and then Christmas was quickly approaching, so by the time Riley and Lucas had time to talk, it was time for him to leave.

Which left now, the last weekend before school started again. There was still a part of Riley that didn't want things to change, that wanted to cling to the past just a little bit longer. But it was tiny enough that she could hold it in her hand and crush it. You couldn't put off growth forever. And what was true - and what had been true for a while now - was that she and Lucas outgrew each other.

Riley found Lucas sitting on the steps, away from the group. Silently, she joined him, taking a seat next to him. "I missed you while you were gone," she said, because it was true.

Lucas smiled. "Yeah?"

"We all did."

"I missed you guys too."

Silence hung between them for a moment. Riley had spent a long time wondering how she'd start this conversation, but now that she was in the middle of it, she knew exactly what to say. "Do you remember right when we first met and we all went to the library?"

"Yeah, of course," Lucas said, looking confused, not unlike many of their recent conversations.

"You told me a story and I loved it. I still love it. I think I'll always love your stories, Lucas. But I think I'll love them more when I'm not forcing myself to hold your hand while you tell them."

Lucas sat back, quiet for a second. "Oh." He looked at her. "Are we still friends, though?"

"Yeah, of course. Do you want that?"

"I want that. You're always gonna be one of my favorite people, Riley." Then he looked away, smiling a little sheepishly. "But I think you're probably right."

As soon as he said those words, Riley was surprised by how much relief she felt. She looked over to where Farkle was sitting, talking to Smackle. When the librarian asked seventh-grade-Riley if she wanted to hear a good story, Riley had been so sure that was about her and Lucas. It was a good story, but maybe it was over now. Or maybe there was a different one waiting for her that she'd been writing between the lines.

When Riley looked back at Lucas, he was watching Zay and Maya chase each other around on the grass. Maybe that was true for the both of them.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

They sat there for fifteen minutes longer. Lucas told her about his time in Texas and Riley got him caught up on what he'd missed while he was gone. By the time they re-joined the group, Farkle and Smackle and Maya and Zay were standing around talking to each other. Zay looked at the pair. "Off googly-eyeing each other?"

"I hope not," Riley said. Zay raised an eyebrow. "We just broke up."

There was a moment of stunned silence before Smackle burst out saying, "Zay and I are dating!"

Riley's jaw dropped. "What?"

"Smackle!" Zay said.

"Wait," Lucas said, shaking his head in confusion. "You aren't dating Maya?"

"What?" Maya's eyes widened.

"Dude," Zay was shaking his head too. "You're literally best friends with us, how could you think we were dating?"  
"How did I not know you two were?" Lucas defended himself, gesturing at Zay and Smackle.

"Because we were keeping it secret," Zay said. "Which, let me tell you, was the hardest thing I've ever done."

"Why?" Riley said, bewildered.

Smackle piped in. "We were waiting for the right time."

Zay turned to her. "How is this possibly the right time?"

Smackle just looked meaningfully from Riley to Lucas to Farkle and then back to Riley again. "This is the perfect time."


	10. Epilogue

**we have come to the end of this story, alas. thank you all for reading and reviewing! i know it was kinda a fluff fest but i hope that was what you were looking for! enjoy the last chapter, and until next time, this is dana, signing off. **

**Epilogue - 2 ½ years later**

It felt so strange to be cleaning out her room. Riley was going to miss it - college dorms didn't have bay windows or Mayas to sit in them for hours. Farkle was over, helping her pack everything up into boxes. They were headed to NYU together. Not too far would be Zay at Juilliard. Smackle got into Harvard, but she and Zay were planning on doing the long distance thing. And Maya and Lucas -

"Have they said it yet?" Farkle called from the closet.

"No," Riley groaned. "Maya texted me that she wants to say it, but she doesn't want to mess anything up."

"Lucas told me the exact same thing."

Riley shook her head. Well, they'd be able to figure it out because they were both headed to Chicago. It was hard to fathom she and Maya being so far from each other. "It only took us a month to say 'I love you.'"

"To be fair," Farkle said, "we had said it before. Just in a different way." Riley thought about it for a moment. She guessed that was true. "They'll figure it out. The only people who don't know Maya and Lucas are in love with each other are Maya and Lucas." Then he was quiet for a moment, except for some rustling from the closet. "Hey, Riley? What's this?"

"What?" Riley said.

Farkle came out holding a sparkly piece of paper. "Things Riley Matthews' Future Boyfriend Will Do For Her?"

"Oh my god. I forgot about that."

"I feel like this would have been a very useful resource to have." They both read over the list together and she felt her heart swell. Ten-year-old Riley would not be disappointed. Surprised, but not disappointed.

"I think you did all this stuff even before we started dating."  
"I haven't filled my quota for the last one yet though." Farkle grinned. Riley's eyes dropped to the bottom of the page. 8. Call her beautiful every day. "Thank you for being my beautiful girlfriend. I think I'm the luckiest guy alive."

Kissing Farkle felt just as right as it did the first time, when everything was still a little nervous and unsure. But even then she knew what she knew now: that she was the lucky one.


End file.
